9 mind tricks to get what you want
Play those mind games
There’s a subtle tactic to make things go your way in your career, love life, and social world —one that has nothing to do with effort or luck. It’s called priming. Research shows that by exposing people to specific words, body language and symbols, they can be affected in a way that benefits you without their even realizing what’s going on. Here’s how to use subliminal moves to get an edge.
1. To seem like a team player at work ...
Put up a picture of your dog (or even a friend’s pup) in your workspace. When people look at shots of a pet dog, they not only tend to presume you’re loyal, but they may also act more loyal toward you. But don’t paper your cube with canines. Research shows that too many personal shots make others perceive you as a less professional worker.
2. To appear more powerful in the office hierarchy ...
Wear a chic all-black outfit to work, and don’t smile as often as you’re inclined. You’ll be seen as assertive and directed. Studies have found that people in black uniforms (like sports teams) are viewed as more dominant figures, while the act of keeping a neutral face is associated with higher status and power in a work environment.
3. To bond with the boss ...
Offer to get her a hot cup of coffee — even if you’re not her assistant — and chat her up as she’s drinking it. A recent study showed that just by holding the high-temp liquid, she’ll implicitly assume you’re an emotionally warm person — someone very likable. Just don’t hand her an iced latte or you could trigger a frosty reception.
4. To have "the talk" without making your partner flip out ...
Take him to a restaurant that has soft feminine colors and furniture with few angular lines. Researchers think that simply being in this kind of an environment can influence a person to behave in a more feminine way in terms of communicating. That means that he’ll be more likely to be open and disclose his true feelings to you
5. To make your crush fall for you on a dinner date ...
Subtly touch the back of his hand as you’re reaching across the table for bread. It’s a proven way to win someone’s affection: Libraries and car dealerships have higher customer-satisfaction ratings when workers imperceptibly touch their clients. Touch activates the human desire to bond.
6. To seem more alluring when you meet a guy ...
Talk about a beach vacation you took using sensual terms (e.g., “The sun felt so fabulously warm against my skin”) to paint a mental picture about the climate. According to psychologists, this seductive I-feel-like-I’m-there speech will make him associate your personality with the lush sensations you’re describing.
7. To impress a guy’s parents the first time you meet them ...
Casually praise someone whom you’re certain his mom or dad holds in high esteem, such as a political figure, author, or celebrity. Experts say that as you talk about their hero in a positive light, your targets start to think about all the qualities they admire in that person. And because they’re looking at you, they’ll subconsciously link you with that person’s positive traits.
8. To make a friend out of an acquaintance ...
Start mirroring her behavioral tics, like touching your hair when she touches hers. We like to see ourselves in other people. Researchers at New York University found that when you’re sitting across from someone who’s unconsciously shaking his foot, if you start moving yours in a similar but unobtrusive way, then the person feels more positive toward you.
9. Your slob roomie to clean up after herself more often ...
Spray a bit of liquid all-purpose cleaner in the air right before she enters the skanky spot in question. A Dutch study recently proved that the faint smell of a cleaning product will spur people to start picking up the area around them. You can also prime her by squirting a little fluid in the bathroom sink before she goes in to use it.